This is just a little side note!! Phillip and I and even Mikey pray about the whole adoption process everyday all day. We were in Hancocks last night when we started talking about being in the process of adoption and how the birthmom is due next month. Why is it that peoples first thought is, "Oh, what are you going to do it is she changes her mind?" or "That's exciting but what if it doesn't go through?"
Ok... so the answer the those questions are: We will probably cry and be a little upset but in time we will have a peace about it because obviously that was NOT the baby God has for us. It happened before and I pray it doesn't happen again but if it does God is not going to leave us hanging. I at least know that much!
It makes me start thinking though about how many times I've been the negative response to someone else's experiences. What is it that makes me think I know what is best for their life? Who put me in charge and God on the back burner? I did. This whole experience that we have been going through is changing my life. In every way. One, we'll have a baby soon. Two, I have seen so many times God answer our prayers... that way we wanted him too and the way He just said no. Three, my family, me, Phillip, and Mikey have become closer because we pray together all the time. Last (but I know there are a ton more), it's making me realize how much I try to be God in little situations and only let God be God in the bigger ones.
A few weeks ago our Pastor, Monty, had challenged us to read the book of Acts to better prepare ourselves for the next few services. As I was reading I found a verse that spoke to me as soon as I read it. I had been reading about the apostles traveling and speaking the the Good News. Then in Chapter 5 talks about how they were being persecuted for what they were teaching. They were flogged and ordered not to speak in the name of Jesus and the next verse was
Acts 4:41: The apostles left the Sanhedrin, rejoicing because they had been counted worthy of suffering disgrace for the Name.
This verse just reminded me that how much heartache and pain would I take and still rejoice about because in was for the Lord? It has challenged me to think about the adoption in a different way. As I still pray it happens for us and we get a baby, I also pray that if it doesn't I will still rejoice and praise God. I know it will be hard to do but if my suffering can impact someone elses life and change it then it's worth it. And I can praise God for using me!! Harder to do than say but maybe now that I have told everyone this you can remind me if needed be!
So back the the story about being at Hancocks. After the lady asked me about the birthmom changing her mind my response was, "Well it's already happened once and we'll just know it's not the baby for us. God knows." Before I could finish saying that sentence another lady finished it for me and kept saying, "That's right, God knows. God know, that's right." Turns out she had adopted 21 years ago and said that God knew for her. How awesome is that??!!!!
Sorry if this post is back and forth but now you know how my mind thinks!!
Psalms 28:7- The Lord is my strength and my shield, my heart trusts in him, and he helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise him
No comments:
Post a Comment